I decided a couple of months ago to embark on a journey. One I honestly did not think I would be able to finish. I thought to myself, I am going to prove I can not do this. I am going to keep trying until I fail because I do not think I can do this.
I wanted to start jogging. So I did...using a program called C25K or couch to 5k. It is a program designed for people who do not run, to get running. I had tried running a couple of times in the past and could not do it because I would get so short of breath. Since the last time I tried, I discovered I have a touch of asthma. It was worse during pregnancy, cold weather, when I am sick, and when I try to exercise. I have an inhaler now that I use just when I need it.
Anyways, I started my mission to prove to myself I couldn't do it. The first week, you start jogging in one minute intervals alternating with walking. I can not tell you how hard it was to jog for that minute. I would look at the timer and pray for the seconds to magically tic by faster. They never showed me any mercy. My feet were screaming. So much so that I literally had to stop walking and rest to feel like I could get back home.
A dear friend of mine schooled me on how to buy good running shoes. That made such a difference I could not believe it!!! I continued on with my journey in running only to be crippled with shin splints. I literally felt like someone was stabbing me in the shins. I could not go up and down stairs. I pushed myself to run with shin splints. HUGE mistake. I had to stop and sit at the park because it hurt so much. If I would have had my phone, I would have called my husband to come and get me they hurt so bad. After talking to people, I realized ice was the magic trick and ibuprofen certainly helped.
I wondered what people thought of this at least slightly overweight chick running and walking. Then, after a couple of weeks, I stopped caring. I adopted the attitude of 'if you don't like the way I look jogging, then don't look at me.'
I pressed onward. It just so happened I started this journey during the second hottest summer on record. It forced me to do something else I never imagined I would do....get up before work to exercise. I also went after dark when the heat wasn't so oppressive. I learned the value of moisture wicking clothing (I think that is what it is called). Cotton does NOT breathe well at all.
I was still waiting for my body to betray me. Then, it did. I tried jogging two days in a row. I think it was about 3/4 of the way through the program. I could not catch my breath. I stopped jogging in my workout, caught my breath, and started again to no avail. I felt defeated. I talked to my doctor who said to try again after a few days and allow my body to rest. Being the non-compliant patient that I am, I waited two days, did my inhaler and picked up where I left off.
The difference was striking. I made it through my work out and felt like I could keep going. Believe it or not, I was MAD! I had taken the program slower trying to make sure I could keep my breathing in check and never even tried my inhaler. Now, I do my inhaler about 10 minutes before starting. The difference still astonishes me. It is a matter of muscle conditioning the majority of the time vs. my breathing.
I pressed on through the program now determined to prove to myself that I COULD do it. I added a few new tunes that happen to motivate me and jogged three miles. That is beyond crazy to me!! I started out praying for 60 seconds to go by faster and now I am working on shaving time off my 3 mile jog. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I would be physically capable of doing this. It took me about 12 weeks to get to this point. Even more surprising--I get lost in my thoughts when I am jogging. It is almost like I can disconnect physically and spend time inside myself. It is a comforting place I enjoy visiting.
There is something to be said for accomplishing a physical goal...to push your body to its limits...and then a little more. I always thought people were crazy for jogging religiously. Now, I get it. To feel my muscles grow, my heart and lungs burn to keep pace with my legs, and then suddenly it isn't so hard anymore, to know that I can push my physical body to do more is addicting. The knowledge that I can do something I put my mind to that is just for me, no one else, is intoxicating.
I am signed up for my first 5K race. It is something I never thought I would be capable of doing. I will have a race number! I will get a t-shirt that says I did a 5K! Better yet, another friend who inspired me to even try the program will be there with me. She is actually training for a marathon now, so this will be no challenge for her. But she is doing it to support me! A coworker says she will go too. To say I am excited is an understatement!
What a journey that I am on...and it isn't even over yet :)
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